Well, by now we have all heard the news of the helicopter crash that killed 9 people, including Kobe Bryant and his daughter Gigi. I mentioned this briefly last week in my post because all the reports were coming out as I was writing. As the week went on I became what Kristin called obsessed with it. I did watch a lot of videos and listened to a lot of people talk about all the different aspects of the situation. It is awful when any lives are lost in any tragedy, but especially when it is 9 at one time. All those people are special to their families. While Kobe and Gigi got most of the attention because of Kobe’s status as a professional athlete, that doesn’t take away from the importance of those other 7 people that were special to the people close to them. I have prayed for all of their families this week because it would be hard to try and deal with it when every time you turn on the TV or get on any social media it is there and you have to relive it again. I know it will take time for them to process all of this and my prayer is that they turn to God to help them with that grieving process.
As this week went on I found myself watching things any free moment that I had. I watched TV and clips on social media and interviews with Kobe. I watched as some of his friends talked about him and told stories about him. It fascinated me. For several days I couldn’t figure out why I was so intrigued by it. I didn’t know why I wanted to watch so much of it. Then it came to me. I could relate to some (not all) of his story, as I’m sure some of you can too. He was basically the same age as me. I could relate to the process he has gone through as a human being. Kobe came into the NBA straight out of high school. He made his debut when I was a sophomore in high school. In some of the interviews I watched with him he admitted later in his career that when he first got to the NBA he was arrogant and somewhat selfish as a basketball player and a person. He said he didn’t always handle things the right way. But he was really good at basketball. It didn’t take long for him to go to the top as one of the best players in the entire league. At that time I followed the NBA really close. In my opinion it was more fun to watch than today’s NBA. So that is one reason I followed it more closely than today. But at that age I followed all sports a little more closely than I do these days. Now I just don’t have as much time as I did back then to keep up with it. As I got older I still had the image of Kobe in my head as the arrogant player that he was when he first came into the league. I didn’t see the person he matured into over those years while I wasn’t following basketball as closely as I once did. His passing has changed a lot of people. If you listen to some people that knew him, they have realized some of the things they need to change. There have been professional athletes this week that have had problems with other athletes or other people in their lives and have called them and made things right with them. They have patched broken relationships because this made them think about their own life. Sometimes tragedy makes us think this way. Had Kobe passed away when he was 90, he may not have had the impact on people that his passing at 41 had.
Sure, he had his problems just like anyone else has. We all have things in our past we wish were different (if you don’t, you have done very well for yourself). He had his rape scandal back in 2003. That case was dismissed and settled out of court. He adamantly denied the rape accusation but admitted publicly to infidelity and issued an apology. As I watched everything in detail this week, I saw that this was the turning point in his life. This is when he began to grow up. I watched an interview with Kobe and Steven A. Smith after that incident in 2003. Steven A. asked him about that whole situation. Kobe responded with, “God is great. Don’t get no simpler than that.” Steven A. then asked him, “did you know that before that incident took place?” Kobe responded with, “You can know it all you want, but until you have to pick up that cross that you can’t carry and He picks it up for you and carries you and the cross, then you know.” That was a big turning point in Kobe’s life. That is when he grew closer to God. That is when he became a better husband and eventually a father.
That’s what I missed in those years I wasn’t following basketball as close. I missed the person he matured into. I’m not talking about the basketball player he was. He was good when he came into the league and was good when he retired. That never really changed. His game may have changed some, but he was great his whole career. But he matured into something different. There were so many stories I saw of him helping kids. He didn’t allow media or security when he went to visit or help kids that were sick. He didn’t want people to make a big deal about it. He wanted it to be a special time between him and those kids. That didn’t really come out in the media until after his passing because of the private way he did it.
There are some things I took from this whole tragedy that will stick with me for a long time. People say that the best people, or the best athletes, or the best at whatever else it is they do, all have one thing in common. They make those around them better. He did that as an athlete, but he also did that as a person. As I watched this week, I was drawn to his mentality. He was a very intelligent person. He spoke 3 languages fluently. He knew parts of 2 or 3 others. That is incredible. But what motivated me the most was his relentless pursuit of perfection and his desire to be successful at whatever it was that he did. He had a drive to be the best at whatever he was part of. That drive was not only in sports, but in his family life as well. That drive shifted even more to his family after he retired a few years ago. It shifted more into being a father and a husband. It was in helping others that were less fortunate. It was visiting those kids that were sick. It was in everything he did. He wanted to make those around him better. He wanted to be the absolute best he could be for those around him. He loved life. He loved being a father and a husband. Like I said earlier, I missed his maturation during those years. I didn’t really realize what he had became. He wasn’t perfect but none of us are. The difference is that the mistakes people in his situation make are publicized by the media. So everyone knows about them and people tend to form a more negative opinion about them than they do their friend or someone they know that does the same thing. But because he was about the same age as me, I can relate to that maturation process. There were a lot of things in his life like his scandal in 2003 that I can’t relate to. There are a lot of things about the lifestyle he lived as a professional athlete that I can’t relate to. But, I have talked about my own process before in this blog. I think that is why I was so drawn to this situation. I can relate to making changes in my life that made me and the ones I’m around every day better. I can relate to working hard to become a better husband and father. It is a process that’s not easy to go through and is never complete.
What if we had that same passion and drive in our lives? What if we had that same desire to be successful in everything we did? What if we had the desire to make everyone around us better? I can honestly say that by watching the things that I have watched this week and seeing the person and the husband and the father he became, I am more motivated to be that for my family and the people I am around. People may think that’s crazy or think he was just a famous rich athlete so who cares what he did or said. People can have their own opinions and that is just fine. But as a former athlete and currently still a coach, I relate a lot of things to sports. Just like other people relate things in their life to their own interests. I feel like there are a lot of lessons on how to do right that can be learned from people of Kobe’s status too. Sometimes all we hear is the negative things because that’s what the media wants us to hear. They don’t want to publicize the good stuff because we sadly live in a society where that won’t get as much publicity. That won’t make the biggest headlines. Maybe that athlete doesn’t want the attention and does those positive things in private. So in turn they don’t get publicized. That happens too, just like in Kobe’s example. But the negative always gets put out there. Some people thrive off of negativity. Some people thrive off the other person being worse off than themselves. If they can point out that other person’s flaws or something negative about them, it makes them look better. That is sad, but unfortunately the way a lot of things happen in this world.
Think about someone you look up to. It may be an athlete, a movie star, your parents, a sibling, or whoever else it is. What makes them so special? What makes you look up to them? What qualities do they possess that motivate you and make you want to be like them? If we are always trying to be better then we should always be evaluating things in this way. Ultimately, the person I want to emulate the most is Jesus Christ. That is the ultimate pursuit of perfection. We know we will never be perfect. There was only one person that was ever perfect and will ever be perfect and that is Jesus. But we can strive to be that. We can look to Jesus for how to do that. But, we can also look to people here on this earth to relate to as well. We can find people that motivate us and try to be that person for someone else too. I challenge everyone this week to think about someone that motivates us to be better. Think about someone that pushes us to pursue perfection in everything we do. Think about someone that makes everyone around them better. Figure out what it is that person does and make that a part of our life. Let that fuel us to be that for someone else. Tell that person what they mean to us and pay it forward. Live our life in such a way that we pursue perfection in everything we do and motivate other to do the same!!!